Soundtrack Through The Arcana - Strength


I've taken a nearly 1 month hiatus from this series, though it's not been intentional. It's more so been a matter of other things needing attention - though it's been on my mind and I've been thinking about this selection since the moment I wrapped up The Chariot. I challenged myself to find something a bit more, how shall I say it...extroverted? Loud and proud? But, the last few weeks have been terribly introspective and pensive and reflective and representative of the other side of the Strength coin; the quiet inner rising.


Song: Silent All These Years
Artist: Tori Amos
Album: Little Earthquakes

Maybe my favourite album ever - this song has come to mean a lot to me through the years - especially potent during my more formative years and really in any instance where transformation was on the horizon. I really resonate a lot with some of feeling invoked in this track because I've often been frustrated with myself for not having courage to speak up, say the "right" thing or confront something that I believed posed real barriers in my life.

I remember a time when I was in grade 3 and my best friend at the time was this really vocal, intelligent, confident, leader-type. I admired her and loved being in her company, but every once in a while her opinion (as strong as it was) would clash with mine. But, instead of sharing my feelings (knowing they would likely not rouse any debate), I would shrink and agree. I knew at the time what I was doing and it pissed the hell out of me that I couldn't just do something as simple as dare to be different - even a little bit. This is a minor instance of suffering from self-silencing and yes, I understand the song's narrative is likely broaching much more serious topics and consequences, but my point is this fear can start young. And sometimes for seemingly no reason.

So for me this song represents strength in the sense of having the courage to just say it, whatever it is, and to own it and live it and breath it. It's about realizing the strength in your voice and your thoughts and even your rage, and taming the beast within who wouldn't dare allow any of it out.

Excuse me, but can I be you for a while
My dog won’t bite if you sit real still
I got the Anti-Christ in the kitchen yellin’ at me again
Yeah, I can hear that
My scream got lost in a paper cup
You think there’s a heaven where some screams have gone
I got twenty-five bucks an’ a cracker
Do you think it’s enough to get us there
But what if I’m a mermaid, in these jeans of his with her name still on it
Hey, but I don’t care ‘cause sometimes, I said sometimes I hear my voice.
And it’s been here silent all these years

So what do you think, does this one capture the energy and essence of Strength for you? Have a listen and let me know what you think. The Spotify playlist is below - scroll down to find the track!